Rocki Mara's Top 5 Worst Clients & Why Hairdressers Secretly Hate Some Clients (No Filter)

[00:00:00] what the fuck is this five things that Rocki Mara hates about Jason he has bad hair and bad breath a shitty voice gray nose hairs stupid opinions oh well you kind of got me there dude real hairdressers telling real stories about their experiences from behind the salon chair and we are now saying the quiet parts out loud this is shit I told my hairdresser welcome back to another episode of shit I told my hairdresser

[00:00:54] guys thank you so much for going through and telling all your friends about us thanks for following please get up on Instagram and on Tik Tok give us a little follow on there also get on wherever you get your podcast give us a like give us a listen tell all your friends 10 tell people that you like and 20 that you just fucking hate that way we go through and be in their goddamn little ears just hurt their little ears but if you guys don't mind go through and give us a rating on anywhere on Apple Podcasts or on Spotify anywhere you can you're hearing this podcast and

[00:01:53] somewhere youスk outro you the you love the same way you guys thank you with us you love that way you compile a new is co-encSmith your headspace wow you well can't go see when you're getting my 몸 done one of my无bero amazES rose guitare feelings командy and you've been invited and I want to go through and talk about this and I am a great idea to thank you for the last month of a hour and I had one holy podcast shown in this new video for the työ provincias I've上 floor your had and did it to make me find it Jazzux online The How did you decide to go through and go with these lists and just put them on on like tick tock or on Instagram What was what was the thought process on that"?

[00:02:18] You know, I always wanted to be a hairstylist content creator, but I knew I wasn't very polished and I knew I was very against the grain. And I knew I was always going to be afraid of people judging my work. So I wanted to come and, you know, shine a light on the other side of what it's like being a hairstylist of the kind of clients you get and you want to rip their heads off or that are cheap or, you know, it's not you don't always get the best clients in your chair.

[00:02:48] You don't. You actually get assholes and bratty kids. And I don't know. I wanted to show the unglamorous side of being a hairstylist. Well, that's kind of funny because that's what that's one of the things that we talk about on the show is like we go through and we say the quiet parts out loud. And you were doing that on social media and you had me on the fucking ground.

[00:03:12] I was laughing so hard. I wanted to go through and bring you on the show and kind of give us your list of the things that you kind of like that kind of drive you crazy because you do your top five, like five things that kind of drive me crazy. Yes. All right. So now we're talking about clients in general. Are we just talking about like services? Oh, we're going to start with clients in general. All right. Because this is the stuff that people don't like we say it on the show.

[00:03:41] You know what I mean? But it's just kind of like sometimes it's great to just have like a normal hairdresser to go through and be like, I hate this bitch because her breath is bad. Or she's got a rotten tooth that kind of goes down. You know what I mean? Like her breath just stinks. Like, does that drive you nuts? You know what? Yes. Because the people whose breath stink talk the most. And I don't know why that's a thing. They don't shut the fuck up and they keep going and going.

[00:04:08] And I don't know if they're unaware, but it's, but you know what? I think. How could you be unaware? How could you be unaware? You know what you can taste it when your breath stinks, you know it. Listen, and I always, I joke around to people and say this all the time. If you have somebody with bad hygiene in your chair, would you rather it be a man or a woman? Which is more offensive. You know what I'm saying? If a bad breath is coming from a man, it's like fine. But when it's from a woman, it's like bitch. Really?

[00:04:37] I don't know. I don't know. I think either one, you know what I mean? I think it's like, it's bad. I always keep mints at my station and they never want a mint. I don't get it. I always keep mints there. They never want one. But the ones that do this shit though, they're always the ones who have to keep constant eye contact with you. Yes. You know what I mean? They're like, they're talking to you and then they turn their head like this to talk to you. Oh my God. And you're like, why? Why? Like, you don't have to look me in the eyes. Right.

[00:05:07] I don't get it. It's like, use the fucking mirror. That's what the mirror is for. Yes. Or the client, the client with too many pictures. I got the biggest beef with her. You know what I'm saying? Where the whole time she starts off with one picture and then she compares. She don't even really like the hair. She likes the person who's wearing the hair. Yes. Or, you know, and it's to the point where you're never on the same page with them. When you're like, all right, but we need to get started.

[00:05:33] And we know we want to go lighter, but we don't know, you know, what shade. If we want your roots smudged out, if we want bright roots. Yes. And then it's like, it's, you know, after you're getting blow dried and you're still showing me different pictures of colors, it don't matter at that point. You know what I'm saying? Like once you've been processed, but you're still like, oh, well, we can do this and we can do this and we can do this. No, we can't. It's an extra. That's a whole separate appointment. Yeah.

[00:06:02] Like, I don't know. So I think like those very not knowing what they want clients. Uh-huh. So you're trying to like tango with them. Right. Oh, see, that drives me crazy. But I mean, what would you say is the cutoff point for a consultation? Like, where do you stop at that point? Because for me, it's like, if it's, we're in the 10 minutes, I'm kind of like, whoa, we're really getting your haircut. Right. Yeah. Um, yeah. 10 minutes.

[00:06:30] Unless I've like done your hair before, like cut your hair. Not, I know your hair. Right. Um, but if you're just like a new person and you're very undecisive. Oh, red flag. What, how do you feel about like patch tests? Uh, I don't do, I don't do any color. So I don't. No, okay. Okay. Okay. Yeah. So do you ask me ahead of time before for a patch test or? So I'll say this. I work for a corporation. I don't have my own salon.

[00:06:58] I think I would be the stylist moving forward. If I ever did have my own, I would charge for a strand test because, um, that is time. And that really does show the client. This is what your hair is going to do. And a good strand test is going to take 40 minutes. You know, you can slap 40 volume on there and see, but I mean, you don't want to like blow somebody's hair strands out. Yeah. Well, I don't know. It depends on the person. You know what I mean?

[00:07:25] But no, but I mean, you, you're right. Like one of the things that you were saying is a little too, like part of your list that I like though too, is like you talk about like face masks. How do you feel about people wearing face masks? Oh my God. Yes. COVID is over. Oh my gosh. It has been over. I even hated face masks when we had to wear them because you couldn't see what people look like. You couldn't see their reaction. It was always awkward. I've, I've cut face masks before on accident. That pissed people off.

[00:07:54] I mean, I just feel like, what's the point? Like, why do you have it on? If you feel sick, stay the fuck home. You know what I'm saying? Like why are, it's a fashion statement in my opinion. Like what's going on? Right. No, I'd rather you put a fucking helmet on. Right. Yeah, exactly. I don't get it. Like, especially now, you know what I mean? It's like, if you're sick, just fucking stay home. I'm still going to charge you at. Right.

[00:08:22] But just fucking, if you are that concerned where you have to have to ask. And if you think I'm sick, don't come and get a haircut by me. Okay. I'll never to tell you. Go shave your own head. But as far as like, you know, that, another thing is like, what is your favorite thing to do inside the salon now? Is it cut, color? Blonde hair. Like if I was president, I would tell everybody, you would have to go through a blonde era. I don't think you've experienced life until you've had one.

[00:08:51] Everybody needs a blonde era and a bob era. They need one. As you can see, I have never outgrown my hair. Well, I had to. I don't have any hair left. You know what I mean? But I did have both. I did have both. That's for sure. That is true. All right. Yeah. Okay. What's your least favorite to do though? I hate doing hairlines. Like any type of edge work or when. Oh my God. When women, when they shave off their fucking widow's peak. Oh. Hate it. Hate it. No, ma'am. Right. No.

[00:09:21] That just feels like it goes against my religion. Uh-uh. Yeah. No, I know. But there's, you want to go down and get electrolysis done. If that's what you want. Right. Don't have me shave it off. Right. Do it the right way. Correct. Right. This is going to look shaved and stupid. It looks dumb. And not only that, they don't realize when it grows back. It looks like anybody knows what's going to happen when it grows back into you. Because your bangs, they're like, it's like, if you want a visor, I'll give you a visor. If that's what you want.

[00:09:50] I'll go buy you a visor. Yes. They don't understand the consequences. You know what else I really hate doing as a hairstylist? And I've been put in this boat a few times. Have you ever had to give a child a haircut they didn't want? And their parent is sitting right there, like, enforcing it. Oh, my gosh. I feel like the devil. No. No. What the fuck? Are you serious? So, I was, like, in this situation. This was a couple months ago.

[00:10:18] And this mom came in and had me cut all her little girl's hair off and was standing right next to me. And I'm trying to, and I could tell the little girl didn't want to. Right. The mom was telling me, and she was like, yeah, and this is what she gets for telling me a lie. And I'm just like, oh, my God. I wanted to fight the mom. For real? Oh, I hate that. It was a punishment. It wasn't a haircut. It was a punishment. Oh, that's funny. I would have been like, nope. You got to go somewhere else.

[00:10:46] But I'm, like, mid haircut doing it. So, then, you know, I try to, like, change my demeanor and get her excited. You know, oh, we're getting a big girl haircut. Yay. It's going to be hot outside. But, yeah, parents are evil. Ooh. Jesus Christ. Or, like, a little boy who you could kind of tell he wants to grow his hair out, but his dad's a fucking Marine, so he's getting a Marine cut. You know, and you feel like an asshole the whole time. What a bunch. Okay. That, yeah. Yeah. No, no, no. I had a client.

[00:11:17] So, oddly enough, I used to do Patty Davis, Ronald Reagan's, and Nancy Reagan's daughter. Okay. And she had short hair growing up. Okay. And when I got, when I started doing her hair, it was long. And let me tell you, she would freak out. So, imagine the trauma. I mean, literally, I cut myself doing her hair one time because she moved on me because she thought I was taking too much off. So, imagine the trauma you're causing now. Oh, these parents are fucked up. Yes. Yep. So, how do you feel about doing kids?

[00:11:45] You know, I don't mind kids. I think kids, I'll tell you this. One of the most rewarding feelings is making a picky fucking kid happy. For real. Yeah. Because kids are assholes. And they'll be like, no. And kids will make you feel like shit. I'll never forget. I was doing this one little boy's hair. And when I was done, he was like, this looks nothing like the picture. And I'm like, fuck you. But I mean, I feel like kids will make you produce some of your best work. You know what I'm saying?

[00:12:14] Because they tell it like it is. They do. They do. No, they totally do. They don't like it. I mean, especially with me. They're kind of like, you have a lot of gray hair. I'm like, thanks. Why do you have hair in your nose? And you're like, what the fuck? No, I was doing this little girl's hair. You're trying to cut your fucking bangs. I was doing this little girl's hair, right? And little girl, I love little girls. I have two little nieces. So I've only been around like little baby girls.

[00:12:44] So I feel like I know how to carry conversations with them a little bit better. Yeah. But I'm doing this one little girl's hair. And we are deep in conversation. We're talking about Disney princesses, LOL dolls. And then she stopped me and she was like, are you gay? She's like five years old. And I was like, yeah. She's like, I knew it. And it's, you know, just how kids can kind of figure shit out, you know? Right, yeah. Now, was she like shaming you for it though?

[00:13:12] No, you know what's so crazy is the mom was like, oh my God, I'm so sorry. She normally doesn't, you know. I'm like, she just wanted to know. She was trying to fit, looking at me, trying to figure it the fuck out. Like, he's talking to me about princesses. Right, yeah. It was like, was the mom like, was she concerned that you weren't ready to own it yet? Or like something? I don't know. I think she was just shocked. You know, I don't know. I think sometimes parents, I don't know.

[00:13:40] She seemed embarrassed. And I was just like, girl, I don't know. I've been called way worse shit in my day, okay? Right. Yeah. Have you had someone not want to come and see you because of your being gay? Really? Absolutely, yes. What is that like? I would have people come in and it would only be me working and they'll say, they don't deliberately say that. But if I'm the only one working and they sense that, they'll leave. Really? Yes. Absolutely.

[00:14:11] Or like, sometimes I've been in the... Now, I don't think this is like a direct FU to me, but like Muslim women, I gotta leave the salon when they come and get their hair done too. Whoa. And they take care. Yeah, the burqa or those. Hijab. Hijab, yeah. You have to leave. Yes. Or they have to go into like a break room or I'm just never allowed to be, their hair

[00:14:41] is never allowed to be, you know, revealed to me. Which I was like, that was weird because I'm not going with... Yeah, you're not looking at them, but wanting them. You're like, yeah, wrong species, right? We're allowed to be gay over here, girl, but... No, but you want... I've had... We've had that inside the salon and I said, you want to what? If that's exactly what you want to do, where you have a female and you want to be the only one inside the salon and we... You'll make that accommodation for you, but you got to come on a date that we're closed. Right.

[00:15:10] And you have to pay extra for that. Right. Because of you... I am not going through and bowing to any religion. You know what I mean? If you want... If that's what you want, then you need to find someone who has a private suite or if you want to... You know, I can't just go through and tell my staff to leave and then I have to pay them to leave. So if you want me to do that, then guess what? You have to pay for them to leave because I'm not coming out of pocket and losing money. Right. So... But that's just... That's how I am. I mean, I just think find someone with a private suite.

[00:15:40] Let me tell you, I wholeheartedly respect everybody's faith. Sure. 100%. I don't understand why people continue to practice certain things on this side of the world that... You know, that... Why'd that still be in practice if that's not a way of life over here? But I guess that's a whole different kind of conversation. That is not my ballpark. But I do get confused. Do every Muslim woman wear that? No.

[00:16:09] So that's why I get confused. So it's just because of how religious you really are. You know what I mean? So... Because a lot of Jewish women... I think Jewish women do that too. They wear wigs. Yeah. But I had a friend in LA who had a Hasidic Jewish salon and they had private rooms and they would go and do their hair inside the private rooms and they would put on... And then they would put on the wig for them. Because if you notice the Hasidic women or the... Yeah, say Jewish women wear wigs. Yes. Instead of the head covering. Well, they'll wear a wig instead.

[00:16:38] And so she made a killing off of selling wigs. You know? But I don't care what you do or what you want to believe in. You know what I mean? But just... I wouldn't say like you shouldn't push it on to other people or expect... Right. Certain things be done for you. You know, because of your religion. You go and find a place that does... Like my friend had the salon. That's what they did. You go and find that. Right. And if that's not in your town, then go to a town. I have clients... I mean, just today I had a client fly in for a haircut. You know? Fly in.

[00:17:07] Fly somewhere to a city where they have that kind of stuff. That's the way I look at it. And that is the thing is... Everybody does deserve to be accommodated. But you can't expect a business to change their normal operating hours to accommodate something that is outside of their, you know, normal business. Unless you're willing to pay for it. Right. Unless you're willing to pay for it. And if you're willing to pay for it, I have no problems with that. Because today she was willing to pay for it. She paid for her flight. She paid extra for the haircut. I'm cool with that.

[00:17:37] Right. Absolutely. I have no problems with that. All right. But I mean, because I've had it to where it's like I've had guys come in. They see me. Right. And I'm straight. Oh. And they're kind of like, no, no, I don't want them cutting my hair. I'm like, okay. You know what I mean? I'd rather see a female. You know what I mean? And I don't know if because they want it on the female or... I don't know. I think another thing, too, I get a lot, too, is...

[00:18:02] Because sometimes I think me being a gay boy, I have that advantage in the salon where some people be like, oh, I want him. Like, they've never even talked to me before. But they walk in and they... I think we have this stereotype like we're the best hairstylists, gay men are. So I think sometimes I have that as my advantage. But sometimes I've noticed sometimes certain people don't want me to do their hair because I'm white.

[00:18:26] And I have developed a very big black woman clientele doing like a lot of look places, relaxers. And, you know, after the first initial visit with me, they're like, okay, he knows what he's doing. But I think I get that look more. And I don't think it's like a race thing. No. I think it's more of like a, does this boy know what he's doing? You know? Yes. Because I don't. And that is like one of my big things is that I was never taught, you know what I mean, on how to go through and do black hair.

[00:18:56] And I was kind of pissed that way. I missed that. Right. And I worked with really, really good people who are black, who do black, amazing black hair. You know what I mean? And they just do gorgeous work. And but, you know, it's kind of funny because I'll help. I remember one of the girls I'd help her out and the women would look over like, what's this white boy doing? And I'm like, I'm just helping out. That's all I'm doing. But I have to tell them as well, the two that I don't look at me like, can you do my hair? I'm like, no, I'm just not used to the texture. Certain people.

[00:19:25] Listen, that is our job is white stylists. That is our job because when you when you get in there and you don't know what the fuck you're doing and you start fucking stuff up, that's what makes people hesitant. Yeah. But I also will say this. I think when people request to have a white stylist, I think that is a little racist. I think when people request a black stylist, it's a different ballgame. You know what I'm saying? Because I think most white hair is most people could do it. Yeah.

[00:19:54] If you have their cosmetology. You know what I'm saying? Like that's predominantly what you learn on. That's what I teach. Right. That's what I teach. Yes. Right. Well, don't you think it's a different situation? Like if somebody calls the salon and says they prefer a white stylist, it's almost, it's different than if somebody calls and says they want a black stylist. It's very different. It's very different. Because if you're asking for a black stylist, it's basically what you're saying is that you need someone who knows your texture of hair.

[00:20:25] Right. Not who agrees with your race. Right. Yep. You know what I mean? That's very different. So if someone's calling and saying, hey, I want a white stylist, I'd be like, you need to go somewhere else. Right. Like, what? Yeah. Go to the panhandle. We don't do that kind of shit here. Like, I don't think so. Wrong, wrong place. You know, we got to get into a place where we have to be comfortable correcting people. Like the other day I had to correct, and it's uncomfortable sometimes, but I had to correct this.

[00:20:54] It was an older guy. He was trying to figure out the last person who cut his hair and he was describing her. She was, he was kept calling her colored. And I'm like, we don't, you can't, no. Oh. Yeah. She's not colored. She's black. But, you know, I think there is a generation where we need to stop saying they don't know better. Yes, they do. They do. They know better. I mean, who the fuck is out here saying colored? That's just being ignorant. It is. It is. It's just being ignorant. Wow. Oh, shit.

[00:21:22] But see, people think they can get away with shit like that. No. No. Not allowed. You want to know what the, and it's like, you know, we come from a different generation. I don't fucking care. You better learn how to go through a living rich generation with the rest of us. Right. We're not in your face no more. Okay. That is not tolerated. Okay. We have progressed and you need to progress with us. And if you're not willing to, then stay home. Yes. You know what I mean? And buy yourself a flow bean, cut your own fucking hair. You know what I mean? Or some trimmers or do whatever. Don't, don't come in here. You know, wow. No shit.

[00:21:52] Question for you. We're not going to leave the gay topic. All right. So we're going to go right back to that. All right. Okay. Have you had guys come in who are, I'm going to say this air quotes here, straight, right? With like a family, you know, like you do the wife's hair, you do their kid's hair. Have they ever hit on you? Some of the guys have that. Oh my gosh. Yes. All the time that happens to me. Really? Okay. It's so flattering.

[00:22:22] But I'll say this. I, my, my dad is gay and my dad did not come out the closet until after I did. So I grew up in a household and I seen what that can do to a female being married to a gay man and the effects it has on a family. Yeah. So as much as it's cool, I mean, yeah, I do think it's hot. I don't try to pursue people that have families because I've seen what it does to somebody firsthand. Right.

[00:22:49] But do guys come in as long, like hit on you? Hell yeah. Or they'd be so fucking nasty. They'd be like, oh, let me show you this picture of this hair. I'll kind of hold dick picture. Oh, I'm like, sir, you just, you so proud of that thing. Ain't you? Really? Oh my God. They'll, so they'll show you like their own dick pics. I'm going to go, oops, sorry. I don't know how that got in there. Right now, I don't even give out my phone number because of that. Like, no.

[00:23:16] Like you can have my hair Instagram page, but no. Really? Okay. You never know who you're dealing with or who can snap. Or sometimes I've been in a situation too before where, because I use, you know, gay people, men are men. So sometimes, okay, I might feel bad for your wife, but I'm still human. But why are you not deleting our messages?

[00:23:45] And now you got your wife knowing me and you done. And now she's threatening me and all my shit. So you got to be careful because baby mom, nothing scares me more than an angry baby mama. Yeah. Seriously, she don't give a call. She'll go to prison right now. I'm telling you right now, if I was a female, that would be like my biggest fear would be like my man would like secretly want other men and would be doing that. But because it's almost like having a double life. Yes, it is.

[00:24:14] No, it really is. Yeah, it is. And that can make somebody snap. Truthfully, that can make somebody snap. Like, it's one thing to know, like your husband is, you know, seeing other women. But like a man, I don't know. I feel like that. But I would hate to be caught up in some shit like that again. Nope. Because you're like in the South, though, right? Yes. Virginia. I consider Virginia the South. No, no, no. It is. I feel like it definitely is. You know what I mean?

[00:24:41] So it's very different the way that it's viewed in the South. You know what I mean? It's accepted, but it's viewed differently. You know what? I think I sometimes have a hard time remembering that I am a minority. Truthfully, like I don't live my life like I'm different or I'm not like a normal person. But yeah, it is. Like, I think like even in my high school, there was like me and two other gay people. It wasn't. You know, it's almost fashionable to be gay now.

[00:25:10] Like, I remember being called queer as a kid. People used to say that to like make fun of you. And now kids days will come up to me like, yeah, I'm queer. I'm like, well, when the fuck did this become cool? I know. I know. Especially when I was growing up, it was kind of like a very hateful thing. You know what I mean? It was. Queer was not cool. And now it's. Yeah. Yeah. You want to know what? I'm glad it's getting to that point, though. And it's not being like a hateful thing.

[00:25:39] And I think that at least people can be themselves. Because like when I grew up in my generation, I mean, it was very looked down upon, you know. And thank God now it's just kind of like it's more widely accepted. You know, because I grew up. My mom. I grew up in my mom's hair salon. And she had like gay employees. I grew up around them. You know. And so I have a lot of gay friends. It's just. I'm glad that it's become one of those things that has become accepted. You know what I mean? And it's not like, you know. Because you hear so much hate around it.

[00:26:09] Especially right now in the political arena. You know what I mean? That's the part that sucks. But hate. I hate doing gay people's hair. Oh my gosh. Gay people are one of my least favorite fucking clients ever. They're so picky, bitchy. Oh. Oh my gosh. And let them not have gotten a good haircut by their last stylist. They are getting dog walked in your chair. Oh my gosh. Okay. I will dip and dodge gay people. Anytime I see a gay walking coming through the door, I go hide in the bathroom.

[00:26:38] I'm like, uh-uh. I want no parts. I want no fucking parts. Oh my God. And when the gay couple comes in, nope. I go missing. I will go missing. Like some of my gay clients are some of my favorite clients because they always want something. Most of the time. Most of the time. Some of my females want something militant. You mean by my guys? You know what I mean?

[00:27:08] Like my guys, they usually want something that's like really cool. You know what I mean? So they, it's not like your normal gent's haircut. They'll want something a little more fashionable and they'll kind of push it a little bit more, which is really good. But what's your biggest beef with the gay community when they're coming in? What is this? I think the gay community has such a, I'll say this. I don't have any beef with gay community. Like I'll say this also. Most of my friends are straight people.

[00:27:38] They are. Like all my friends are straight people. I think gay people, like I remember I was doing this one guy's hair. He was really attractive. Um, and he kept telling me, he was like, man, I just think it would be so hot if you cut off all your hair. And I'm just like, I don't give a fuck what you think about me, bitch. Let me think, tell you what the fuck I want to do to your hair. But it's just like, I think gay people look at people sometimes as how they think you should be or look. And, um, that's what I don't like. You know what I'm saying?

[00:28:07] I think people should be able to look and not hold everybody to a standard they held themselves to. Or a look that they held themselves to. They trying to, you know, hold everybody else to. Okay. Yeah. No, I hear it. Is that what you're saying? Um, besides the gay community, what else is like the, your least favorite to do as far as a client goes? And I just want to say, I love the gay community. Okay. Y'all just too fucking. No.

[00:28:37] I know. I know. But you want to, you guys, even like with the straight community, I mean, you have to go through and air your grievances and be like, hey. You know. But I'm going to tell you, I love doing straight people's hair. I know I love straight people. I feel like anytime I get a straight man in his, in my chair, I'm going to tell him exactly what to buy his wife or girlfriend for her birthday, for Mother's Day, for Christmas. Like, so I'd be so locked in with straight people. Like, they'd be like, all right, well, what should I do? Her birthday's coming up. I need to make her feel special. Yada, yada, yada. And you know.

[00:29:07] So you're like your personal queer eye. You're like your. Absolutely. A hundred percent. You know what, straight people really tried with me. For real, like I had this, this group of friends. They invited me to go hunting with them. And I was like, oh, the gesture's there, but. Right. Thanks, but no thanks. They're going to give you a gun? Right. I'm like, what the fuck? Shit. Yeah. No, no.

[00:29:36] Don't give a hairdresser a gun. You know what I mean? Because he's going to go through and shoot his ex. So let me tell you, I shot a gun one time in my life. I shot a gun and I didn't even think it was real. I grabbed this gun. I'm like, this thing ain't real. I shot it and it scared the fuck out of me. I've never shot a gun. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. Do not. Yeah. Okay. So this is a PSA. Do not give Rocky a gun. Don't. Oh my gosh. And especially if it's cute and small, like, right. I'm like, ooh.

[00:30:07] All right. Tell me about the crackhead that you had. Okay. So I had this crackhead and just like gay people, I was trying to dip and dodge her. I seen her and she just was just rocking. Going like this, standing in front of the computer. So I'm just like, oh. And then she like sees me and she points at me and she's like, I want him. And I'm like, fuck. So, you know, the thing with her, she had on a face mask, but her face mask was pulled down to her chin.

[00:30:37] And then she just had like a tooth in there with all this spit going on. And, oh, she kept getting rude. I have this really hard time being passive aggressive. And this woman kept trying to be really aggressive with me. And she cut, her hair was kind of like tangled up and stuff. And she's just like, it never hurts this hard to get. And I was like, well, you can come back when you get your hair brushed or I can just cut these knots out.

[00:31:04] And then like, after I took back control, she kind of sat down just, you know, the rest of the hair kind of. Yeah. That jaw just going. But, you know, that's the thing is I've always been a corporate working hairstylist. You know what I'm saying? So everybody has to get service. You really can't refuse anybody. But I've totally, yeah. If I did have my own, I wouldn't care if you smelled like weed or anything, but like that hyperactive. Hyperactive. Yeah. Yeah. I don't know what that's about.

[00:31:34] Do you get a lot of people that come in that are high? You know, I've had a few drunk people. I don't mind drunk men. I do not like doing drunk parents when they have their kids. I had this one lady come in and she kept, she was drunk. I wasn't doing her hair. I was doing her daughter's hair. And by the time her daughter left, she had like a little boy's haircut because the drunk ass mom kept saying, keep going a little shorter because I could.

[00:32:01] I think she was just so caught up in the conversation she was having with the other stylists. Right. The little girl left with like this little bowl cut. I'm like, sorry, dude. But it's her drunk ass mom's fault. Wow. No shit. Yeah. We, we know we get that too. Cause we, the people who are like, you know, 11 o'clock having a glass of wine inside the salon. You're like, well, okay. Cause we serve wine. You know what I mean? They're like, yeah, I can have a glass of wine. I'm like, fuck it. Why not? It's Thursday. You know, it's 10 AM. I don't give a shit.

[00:32:30] It's not for me. You know, but I do, we do have the clients that come in and it's kind of fucked up sometimes and you know, just high as shit. The ones that like are on Coke or those where they're like right in your face. Oh my gosh. Yes. Oh, it drives me insane. You know what's so crazy? I can't believe I'm about to say this, but I'm definitely one of the most unpolished hairstylists out there. But I smoke every time before I go into work and nobody knows that about me.

[00:32:59] Every time I go to work, I am high as a kite. Weed, of course. But I'm definitely one. And you know what's so weird is when I don't smoke, people ask me what the hell is wrong. They're like, what's wrong with you today? You're all over the place. Yeah. But you want, you know, I know some people that are just like that. You know what I mean? The weed just kind of like settles them down and just, you know, it is what it is. You know, I don't, as long as you're doing the job right and people are paying you. Yep.

[00:33:28] Hey, it is what it is. You know what I mean? So I'm no, I'm no one to judge. I've been, I've worked with plenty of people that have done a mountain of cocaine before they even get up, you know, the courage to walk out and do one haircut. Like shit, I've seen it on stage. You know what I mean? Where people are backstage, you know, doing hair shows. And I'm talking like, I've never seen that much cocaine in my entire life. And I've never even done it. I've never done it. I don't even want to like do a hair.

[00:33:56] Like if I'm smoking weed is one thing, but if I'm doing. Yeah. Bitch, I'm not going to fucking work. Okay. I'm about to enjoy my shit. Like party drug. Isn't that like a party drug? Bitch, I'm not going to work. Right. I'm going to the fucking club. Yeah. That's what I don't get. I mean, I've had guys walk to the salon. I'm talking like, and not no sleep the night before doing a couple of rails just to get to their first client. And I'm like, wow. Not forbid you find one of your clients attractive. I mean.

[00:34:25] Right. Yeah. I've seen that shit too. So. All right. Rocky. Thank you so much for coming on the podcast. I really appreciate it. Yes. Thank you. You guys. It's R O C K I Rocki Mara. M A R A. Get on Tik TOK. Give him a follow. Get on Instagram and give him a follow. Go through and check out his list of top 10 things that he fucking hates about you.

[00:34:52] You do a top 10, top five, but what you hate about me. So. Well, I really appreciate this. Thank you so much for having me on. I had a lot of fun. Me too, Rocky. Thank you so much for being on the show. All righty. You take care, Jason. Let's get a little shittier with shitology.

[00:35:19] For all those parents coming into the salons drunk, trying to go through and get a punishment haircut to their kids. I say, fuck that. Here's what we're going to do, guys. Go through while you're cutting the kid's hair. Have the receptionist or an assistant go outside. Take the license plate off the back of their car. Get half the hair out of their tires and then call the police and tell me you have a drunk driver on your hands. That way, there's no excuse for that cop not to pull them over.

[00:35:46] That way, they can go through and finally get CPS called in their drunk fucking asses. And hey, guys, keep the dick pics out of the salons. We do not want to see them. Well, maybe Rocky does, but definitely do not send them our way. But if you do, make sure you send them to Paula. She'll be back next week. And with that, stay shitty and we'll see you next time. Hey, listener persons.

[00:36:11] If you're enjoying this podcast, please give us a rating on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, iHeartRadio, or Amazon Prime Podcasts, or wherever you get your favorite shit. It definitely helps out our algorithm. Also, check out our shitty posts on Instagram at Shit I Told My Hairdresser, where you can give us a follow and like some of our content. If you'd like to get your story on our podcast, go to our website at ShitIToldMyHairdresser.com. You can leave us a voicemail using the green mic icon or send us an email. And if you like us, tell 10 of your friends.

[00:36:41] And if you hate us, tell 20. And remember, stay shitty, listener persons.