Welcome back to another episode of Shit I Told My Hairdresser*, where no topic is off-limits and the stories are as wild as your aunt’s perm in the '80s. In this episode, Jack and I dive into everything from awkward client interactions to a very disturbing zoophilia confession—plus, the time the FBI set up shop in a Newport Beach mall. Buckle up, listener persons, because this one’s a ride.

Jet Lag, Chauvinists, and the Art of Not Asking Clients What They Do

Jack kicks things off by admitting he’s running on fumes thanks to jet lag. (We’ve all been there—waking up at 4 AM feeling like a zombie with a caffeine IV.) But the real tea? A former coworker who insisted on asking female clients, “What does your husband do?” instead of, you know, treating them like actual human beings.

Key Takeaway:

  • Don’t be that guy. Assuming a woman’s worth is tied to her spouse is so 1970s.

  • Let clients volunteer info. If they want you to know they’re a CEO, a mortician, or a professional llama groomer, they’ll tell you.

The Dark Side of Newport Beach: FBI Stings and Stolen Cars

Newport Beach’s Fashion Island might look like a pristine paradise, but behind those perfectly manicured hedges? Crime. So much crime.

The Plot:

  • A cigar kiosk owner was secretly running a car theft ring, targeting luxury vehicles in the mall parking lot.

  • The FBI set up a surveillance operation in a closed-down restaurant, using newspaper-covered windows to spy on suspects.

  • Even Dennis Rodman got involved, bailing the guy out of jail because… well, Dennis Rodman.

Why You Should Care:
Wealthy areas love sweeping scandals under the rug. But thanks to this podcast, the truth is out—and it’s messier than a bleach mishap.

The Most Disturbing Salon Confession: Zoophilia

Now, for the real WTF moment. A psychologist client dropped a bombshell: she specialized in treating people with zoophilia (sexual attraction to animals).

The Breakdown:

  • One of her patients was having sex with his dog, then putting the dog down when it rejected him.

  • He was banned from adoption shelters after repeatedly replacing the pets he abused.

  • The conversation took such a dark turn, even we needed a mental palate cleanser afterward.

Moral of the Story:
If someone says, “That’s a beautiful animal” a little too enthusiastically… run.

Why You Should Listen to This Episode

✅ Unfiltered stories – No topic is too taboo.
✅ True crime meets salon gossip – Because why not?
✅ Dark humor – We laugh so we don’t cry.

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Pro Tip: If you loved this episode, tell 10 friends. If you hated it, tell 20—because drama is our brand.

Stay shitty, listener persons. 😎