Vertical Cars, Nazi Clients, and Jihads: Wild Stories

From hammered clients giving thumbs-up to racist rants in the chair, this episode of Sht I Told My Hairdresser* is a rollercoaster. Listen now and share your own wild salon stories!

When Clients Go Off the Rails: A Hairdresser’s Diary

Ever had a client so drunk they could only communicate in thumbs-ups? Or one who casually drops a Nazi rant mid-haircut? Buckle up, because this episode of Sht I Told My Hairdresser* is packed with salon stories so wild, you’ll almost feel bad for the stylists. Almost.

The Drunk Mute Thumbs-Up Saga

Picture this: A woman stumbles into the salon, eyes rolling back, slurring her way through a "consultation" that’s more word salad than coherent conversation. By the time the foils go in, she’s downgraded to thumbs-up-only communication. Highlights? Thumbs up. Bathroom break? Thumbs up (but she never actually goes). Then—plot twist—she tries to make the stylist wish her friend “Happy Birthday” via speakerphone.

Moral of the story: If your client is too wasted to speak, maybe don’t let them leave unsupervised. Or, you know, do and let us podcast about it later.

“I’m German. I Hate Jews.” (Yes, Really.)

Then there’s the sweet-seeming older German client shopping for L.A. real estate. Jason suggests a nice Jewish neighborhood (because, hello, community and Shabbat dinners). Her response? “I’m German. I hate Jews.” Cue record scratch. The manager (who’s Jewish) overhears, and let’s just say the haircut ended very quickly.

Pro tip: If you’re a Nazi, maybe don’t announce it in a salon run by a Jewish boss. Just a thought.

“Where Will You Be During the Jihad?”

But wait—there’s more! Another client, a Jewish schoolteacher, sees Jason’s Persian friend Dustin walk in (looking like a “Persian Elvis,” per usual) and asks, “When the jihad comes, where will you stand?” Jason’s reply? “I’ll be at his house throwing bombs at your house.” Spoiler: She left mid-cut.

Dustin’s nickname is now “Jihad.” Thanks, racism.

Why You Should Listen to This Episode

  • For the drama: Drunk mutes, Nazi confessions, and jihad inquiries—what more could you want?

  • For the laughs: Jason’s deadpan delivery turns chaos into comedy gold.

  • For the solidarity: Every hairdresser has that client. These are those stories.

🎧 Listen now:

Engagement Boosters

  1. Tag your stylist in the comments and share their wildest client story.

  2. Poll: Worst client behavior?

    • Drunk thumbs-up only

    • Racist rants

    • “Can you call my friend?” requests

  3. Storytime: Ever had a client you wanted to fire? DM us on Instagram—we might feature you!

SEO & Hashtags

Keywords: wild salon stories, drunk haircut, racist client, hairdresser podcast, funny podcast, salon drama

Hashtags:
#ShitIToldMyHairdresser #SalonStories #HairdresserDrama #PodcastLife #WTFMoments #HairAndHorror

Stay shitty, listener persons. And remember: If you hate us, tell 20 friends. 😉

P.S. Got a story? Leave us a voicemail at shititoldmyhairdresser.com or email us. Your trauma is our content.